Death After You
by lumoslumiere
Summary: She wasn't destined to live without him. [Misa Centric][one shot]


She always knew she couldn't live without him, but now she realized she really couldn't.

He was God, the King of the New World, Kira, and she was the queen that never really reached the top. She knew she meant nothing to him all along, she was just a tool in his evil plan, something he could use and dispose of quickly afterwards, but she didn't care. Misa didn't care.

All that mattered was the she had been near him for such a long time; all that mattered was that she loved Light and that he was her hero, her saviour. And so there was this pain in her heart; a gaping hole, one she had since her parent's death and one that had closed when she met Light. It was open once more.

She didn't know Light had died until two days after his actual death. She was sitting at their apartment, drinking some tea when Matsuda showed up. She let him in, happily greeting him and offering some tea. But she noticed right away he wasn't acting normally. There was no smile on his face, no happy greeting.

"Matsuda-san..." she said softly. "What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry, Misa." he said, his eyes on the ground. "I'm sorry, but it had to be done."

"What are you talking about, Matsuda-san?" she asked.

"Light is dead." he uttered. "I'm so sorry Misa, but he was Kira and..."

Misa would never understand how three simple words could end her world forever. She never heard what Matsuda-san said next. The next thing she knew her legs had given out under her and she had fallen on her knees, her eyes wide open and sobbing. She could hear Matsuda-san calling her name and holding her tightly by the shoulders, she could hear someone screaming Light's name over and over again. It would be days until she realized she was the one screaming.

She spent the next week laying on their bed and staring at the ceiling, she didn't eat or sleep. Matsuda-san had found her and taken her to the hospital where she stayed under suicide watch for another week.

On Valentine's Day, just a week and half before what would've been Light's birthday, she found out. She had taken the pregnancy test because her period was late, but she never expected it to be positive. But there she was pregnant with Light's child, the son of Kira, the Hope for a world that had taken away the only man she loved. She stared at the ominous test for hours, thinking what her child, the child of Kira would go through in his life. In the end she decided she didn't want the world to take her child away like they had taken Light from her, and she promptly threw herself down the stairs of her apartment complex.

She didn't die like she had expected to, but she lost her child as Matsuda-san kindly informed her while she stared at the wall of the hospital room. She wished she had died with it, then perhaps she could live happily in heaven with her son and Light beside her. Then there would be no more suffering. Instead she was stuck in a hospital for two months while her broken legs healed, every day spent in therapy to help her live. It was useless, she thought, when all she wanted was to die.

She never really understood why she waited so long, a year and one month. Perhaps it was just because she couldn't find the right day to do it, no day seemed worthy enough to commit such an act out of love. And then one day as she walked home from the grocery she noticed the hearts that decorated everything and then it seemed like the right day to do it. She raced back home while her groceries where left thrown on the floor.

She took the gun out. It was hidden under a small compartment in Light's bedside table. He had made a complex system to hide it, but she had always known it was there. It was loaded too, she realized with delight. She sat on the bed, her side of the bed, and held the weapon to her jaw as she remembered every happy moment she had spent with Light on that bed. She was wearing his favorite clothes, her red lace dress and she had put on make up just for him, just how he liked it. She looked beside her and she could clearly see Light sitting there and smiling at her. And the last thought that ran through her mind was 'Don't worry Light, i'll be there soon with you and our son.' And she pulled the trigger.

Matsuda-san found her the next day as he came to visit her. She was buried in between Light and her dead child.

No one ever knew if she had made it to heaven with Light and her child, but they all hoped she had.


End file.
